A few Jokes August Newsletter

Joke 1

An Arthur Anderson partner comes back to his office and says to his manager, “Did you get my mobile message where I said, ‘Ship the Enron documents to the Feds’?”

The manager goes white. “Oh My God! I thought you said rip the Enron documents to shreds.”

Joke 2

An accountant is having a hard time sleeping and goes to see his doctor.

“Doctor, I just can’t get to sleep at night.”

“Have you tried counting sheep?”

“That’s the problem – I make a mistake and then spend three hours trying to find it.”

 Joke 3

A fellow is walking into a hospital and sees two doctors down on their hands and knees in one of the flower beds.

He goes over and says, “Can I help? Have you lost something?”

“No,” says one of the doctors. “We’re about to do a heart transplant on an accountant and we’re looking for a suitable stone.”

 

Joke 4

Wife to husband as they watch their young son playing:

“He’s such a sensitive child.  Let’s wait until he’s older before we tell him you’re an accountant.”

 

Joke 5

 

Conversation between two accountants at a party:

“…….and ninthly…”

 

Joke 6

An accountant leaves a letter for his wife one Friday evening. It reads:

“Dear Wife.

This week I turned 54. I am going away for the weekend. I will be staying at the Hilton with my gorgeous, sexy, 18-year-old secretary.”

When he arrives at the hotel there is a letter waiting for him. It is from his wife. It reads:

“Dear Husband.

I too am 54. I too am going away for the weekend. I will be staying at the Sheraton with my handsome and virile 18-year-old toy boy. You’re an accountant. You’ll appreciate that 18 goes into 54 many more times than 54 goes into 18.”

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